How to work with a controlling person

Added: Ahron Hutson - Date: 14.02.2022 08:23 - Views: 45088 - Clicks: 4539

That insufferable person who micromanages and treats you like you're completely incompetent. No one else is allowed to have ideas; your judgment isn't trusted, and your contributions aren't appreciated.

How to work with a controlling person

A control freak in the workplace is a totally toxicconfidence and happiness-killing distraction no one needs. In fact, trying to change a control freak -to make them respect you, appreciate you, or even just stop being such an overbearing nuisance in your life--will make you crazy. It's an exercise in futility. They're constantly going to be disapproving of how you do things. Even if you try to do things their way, you won't live up to a control freak's standards.

So, step one: accept that you cannot change a control freak. What's left to do? The control freak in your workplace is an enormous, immovable obstacle. You can't get rid of it, so you're going to have to learn to go around it. Here's how. In her book, she demonstrated ways in which a control freak will get inside your head and throw you off your game.

For example, they might say, "Here, I'll finish the report. We all know formatting isn't your strong point. When did I screw up a report? Man, they were talking about it? Who is WE anyway? Control freaks love, love, love to get inside your head like this. Stop giving them the pleasure of succeeding. Talk about paddling upstream Judith Orloff advises, "Be healthily assertive rather than controlling.

Stay confident and refuse to play the victim. Most important, always take a consistent, targeted approach. If you feel like talking to the control freak in your life is like talking to a brick wall, it's not your imagination. They've already decided how things How to work with a controlling person going to go; you're just window dressing. UK counselor Barbara Baker says control freaks are master of arguing.

Your ideas and opinions simply get lost in their clever rhetoric.

How to work with a controlling person

Instead, she says, "Keep it simple. Employ the 'scratched record' technique: state and restate what you believe, feel or need. Finally, move on if it's unbearable.

How to work with a controlling person

Your life is too short and precious to live miserably under the thumb of an unrepentant control freak. If you feel that your safety, security dignity, self-worth, health or happiness are threatened, you need to seriously ask yourself if it's worth it. Top Stories. Top Videos. Getty Images. We all know one. Control freaks love a good power struggle; playing into it never ends well. Try to understand what drives their controlling behavior -- are they fearful of their own failure, or perhaps power hungry?

You don't have to accept it, but knowing what motivates them can help you figure out how to deal with each new aggression. Keep a neutral gaze, expression and tone of voice when speaking with them. Don't let your emotions get the best of you. Make it clear that you're committed to working with thembut let them know your boundaries and that they're non-negotiable. Do you work with a control freak? How do you cope? Share your comments below. Sponsored Business Content.

How to work with a controlling person

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How to Deal with a Control Freak